Last days of the year

Last days of the year" I wish next year will be better". Yall we hear that some many times. I am pretty sure you do your year so if that was worse it was probably because of your choices.

I feel peaceful enough to say that yes we want peace all over the world but yes first guys we need to eradicate money and economy because they are based on greediness.
Then what about violence oh god if Love could be acting that would make go away wars and even domestic violence.

Yes humans we have plan for so much things but when you loose someone of a double cancer you say it wasnt my mom but I feel as if she was. And you wish you can erase illnesses of all sorts and suffering resulting in death.

I never thought a minute to write my goals on paper I am not selfish I am not turn to me for once. I wanna let out that stupid idea that I will change the world. But God will and that is my belief it will be soon the power of GOD that will erase all we can't change now.

For a lot of you he didn't exist well you have choice to not believe. Let me say I am not a dreamer not at all. I won't do list for january because I won't keep my goals. A goal is adjustable yeah guys it is versatile like we are.

So I make the last days fo the year count as much as the other days and let me savor an afternoon on my sofa with my cat behind my computer. Yeah December to me has nothing special but just the taste of a quiet month that soon ending.

ps: don't wish me a happy new year will it be happy to me?  I am just thinking of snowy days and also rains ain't really happy I dislike winter.

What I would say to you: First day of the year

Today, it is Monday January 1st. I am truly blessed to be alive. That is in itself a huge gift specially when depression is here.
People think of new goals to get this year. I decided to have no major goals. Instead I want small but significant goals:

- move my body
-declutter my room
-strive to cut negativity off

Otherwise I just try to not focus about my past. The door is closed go and find a new one on your way. In the meantime I gather knowledge about one interest of mine and I realize why I choose to write.

It is not only to say stories it enhance my health (just reading books about this subject by the professor James Pennebacker), it clear my vision of the future.

My goal is by writting this work is to show how a person who suffer of depression and self depreciation can keep going despite all what this person live.

I wish I can say what I feel without apprehension of fear of being categorized. I felt encourage by a book about  and from Matt Haig reason to stay alive where he talk about his experience about depression. Rarely men speak about that topic.

I know I become strange among those who live "normally" their life. I think nothing is better than to observe notice and reflect. Nothing more important than that.

Truly saying the things I conseal in my innermost is what I WOULD SAY TO YOU.

I promise I will.